Ask A Guy Who’s Not Doing The Gig For Less Than $200

Dear Guy Who’s Not Doing The Gig For Less Than $200,
I recently witnessed a car accident and was asked to give my account of what happened to police at the scene. Trying to be helpful, I also shared my contact information with the man whose car was hit—and now he’s asked me for a date! Would it be unethical to say yes? On the one hand, I may be called to testify in his case. On the other…he’s really cute.
– Crash-Crush in Toledo

Dear Crash-Crush,
The 11th? Yeah, I dunno if I can make that. It’d be tough to squeeze in, that’s for sure. Sitting in with a wedding band is tricky, ’cause that’s what—three, four hours of music? You’re talking about a lot of songs to learn, and it’s not much notice you’re giving me here. I don’t know when I’d even be able to rehearse between now and then. Plus, I already promised my brother he could use my van to pick up some lumber for the deck he’s building. So, yeah, it’d have to be at least 200 bucks. I mean, I’d usually charge twice that, but you’re a friend, so I’m giving you a break here.

Continue reading at theonion.com